But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
