So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
how does that bad decision feel?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize