and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize