sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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