Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Randomize
