is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
