You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
