Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Operation Purity has been aborted
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
