Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
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