Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
