I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
