Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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