Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
