i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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