M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
