"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
