So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I stole a fireplace last night.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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