i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize