sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Randomize
