apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
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