sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
