Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
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