South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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