She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
please don't ironically join a cult
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