But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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