if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
that's an acceptable place to lick
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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