i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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