Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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