I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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