i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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