I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
