Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
