Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Randomize
