Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
