VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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