I hate all girls vehemently.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
