Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
