so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
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