Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Define "chronic" masturbator.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
whose parrot is this?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
