didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
