she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize