overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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