I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
