38 yer olds are good kisserssss
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
