It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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