I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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