weddingsv make me drug and hornr
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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