If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
