I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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