How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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