Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
it was like eating out sand paper
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
