I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
